So it's been a while since I've written anything. I keep thinking of things to write about (believe me there's lots of ideas, but then I forget what I was thinking and another day passes).
Latest kick from the "system" is that I have been refused Invalidity pension. The reason given was because of the discharge letters from the hospice in January.
They had stated they hoped for my regaining function and even return to work. Well isn't that just lovely. I'd also like to win the lotto.
Let's get one thing straight.
I do NOT want this life. This is NOT a choice. I want to have the old me back. It has taken me a very long time to get used to the fact that the old ME is simply gone.
I have not given up a 20year nursing career through choice!! I was loving my job and saw real opportunities for growth there.
I have not CHOSEN to be unable to care for my son let alone myself.
Who knows, Maybe if I had daily access to hydro therapy and only left my bed to go to physio and OT then their hopes for my future may be realised.
Let's face it though, it's simply unattainable. No community hydro therapy. No hyperbaric oxygen therapy available. No access to Cannabis. The withdrawal of Opiates for Fibromyalgia patients. Unable to get hips injected all the time.
So yet again I need to appeal another decision.
Oh and the kicker?? I asked about getting back in to the hospice when I was getting my hip injected again...nope, no can do. Need refering in again. It seems I have to reach crisis point again.
My eyes are the latest thing to fail and with my cognitive impairment (let alone the bone deep fatigue and all over pain) I know dam well I'll never nurse again. How can these people do this to us??
So the fight continues.
Just don't give up people!! They want you to go away quietly. DON'T DO IT!!!
Admittedly it can take a while to get over the anxiety and brain fog to actually do these things.
Thank you for reading. Never feel alone lovelies xxx
Gentle hugs to you all ❤❤❤❤
Keep fighting ❤❤❤😘😘