Is it me?

Some of you may know I'm a big fan of CBD (the none psychoactive part of Cannabis) this wonderful plant has allowed me to reduce my medications significantly. I'm off my morphine type drug, I was feeling really positive......

(CBD deserves a blog all of its own so I'll leave that for another day ❤)

So what happened? Two particular Health care professional's happened that's what.
What the hell is wrong with these people!?!?

It feels so odd to say that because I was one not too long ago. I can kind of excuse myself as an ICU nurse (I still feel guilty for not acknowledging chronic pain conditions more), but if pain and rehab is your ballywack then at least do your research. 
I knew it wasn't going to go well as soon as the nurse specialist in rheumatology hadn't heard of CBD. She looked at me like I had two heads....hey that's a point!! Is it me? Do I have 2 heads? 

I mean like seriously, No body, and I mean NO BODY would want to live like this. The constant pain, the constant flares, a scalp so sensitive you shave off your hair. Hugs from your loved ones making you grimace with pain.  

I understand how stress makes the pain worse, of course I do. If anyone wants to take away the very real causes of my stress then have at it!! 

To be given no help apart from being told I really should engage with Psychiatric services is quite frankly insulting. 

Like i said I'd gone into this appointment up beat (I'd cut down on so many of my meds since my previous appointment thanks to CBD), making it quite clear that I'm fighting every single day but suggesting I may need more help, another stint in rehab.....and yet I came out a shadow of myself and YES ironically probably in need of psych help.  The people we turn to for help have no idea how much faith we put in them. How much we trust them. How easily they can shoot us down.

This was a couple of weeks back. I've since picked myself up, dusted myself off and gone back to the fight. 

I know now it IS NOT ME, it is NOT all in my head.....unless you are referring to my brain, yes that is in my head (I saw it on MRI)....

So I can wholeheartedly reassure all my fellow fibro warriors (and all other invisible illness sufferers) YOU ARE NOT ALONE and IT IS NOT ALL IN YOUR HEAD. 

I BELIEVE YOU ❤❤❤❤❤

This illness is real and it is Debilitating. It causes more pain than any "normal" person can comprehend. 10 times more intense so I believe. 10 times!! Hyperalgesia it's called if you want to name the beast. This is on top of the migraines, eye problems, allodynia, joint pain, bowel issues, sensory overload, cramps, and so much more......

So I urge you again to share, get the word out. It's the only way we can hope to be listened to. 

Thank you for reading lovely people. 

Sending gentle hugs to all that needs one ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

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